By Melinda Bleuel, 2011 Americorps VISTA
Working in interpretation and translation I frequently come in contact with mistranslated words or phrases. I sometimes do French-English translations and make those same silly mistakes. Did you know the words most commonly used for a “birth certificate” in French directly translates to “an extract of the registrar of the act of birth”? Which, in English, makes absolutely no sense.
My experiences working with people and having friends from all over the world really highlights that there are often odd colloquialisms that don’t quit make sense to them because they are literally, “lost in translation”.
I have a friend whose native language is French, she once excitedly exclaimed that she has had her hair put into, “cornbreads.” I corrected her and we still laugh about it. One of my sorority sisters is from Brazil. She is very tall, naturally thin, and had a modeling portfolio. So when I first met her and she said, “I was on America’s Next Top Model but couldn’t do it because I wasn’t old enough” I had every reason in the world to not question her. It wasn’t until a year, and me bragging on her quit often, that I was told she mistranslated her words from Portuguese into English. “I was on”, was just Marcela speak for, “I want to be”. Whoops. With the exception of me unwittingly lying to people for over a year there was very little damage done.
In more extreme cases of language barriers, people usually resort to pantomiming and pointing as a means to convey what they want. The summer of 2010 I was lived in a mid-sized college city called Olomouc. My Czech language skills start at “please and thank you” and end at “strawberry”. After walking about town for an hour one afternoon in search of eye drops I stopped a police officer to ask for directions to the nearest pharmacy. I may not be fluent in Czech but I did know that the word “pharmacy” sounded the same in both languages. Now, I’m not sure if it was my southern drawl that complicated this conversation but after about 8 solid minutes of me saying “pharmacy” and pointing at my red eye and faking a cough I resorted to more extreme measures. I grabbed the note book in my purse and drew a picture of the cross that is on all pharmacy signs and shook a bottle of Tylenol. The police officer’s eyes grew really wide and he flashed a giant smile, “Ohhhh! Pharm-a-seeee!” Well, yes. That is exactly what I thought I said.
However, none of these amusing anecdotes hold a match to the world’s best lost in translation story. I swear that this is true. My university does a summer trip to Olomouc in the Moravian region of the Czech Republic. Students from previous years trickle down their knowledge of the best restaurants, shopping, and bars to all the new students. It was through the grapevine that a girl heard of the very cheap and totally wonderful full body massages at a small spa. The spa also had pedicures, manicures, tanning, along with many other different types of massages. The menu was in Czech and everyone was always told the best way to decipher what you want is to use what few Czech words we knew and the prices along the side. A full body massage is going to cost more than a basic pedicure so look for a word you may recognize like “body” and pick the most expensive one. It works in theory.
The young lady pointed at what she wanted and the lady escorted her to a room and then left. She promptly took off all over her clothes and folded them neatly in a chair. With just her under-roos on, she sat and waited for the Czech woman to return.
When the Czech lady walked back in the room she was carrying a tray of nail polishes and a manicure set. She directed the girl over to a manicure table and proceeded to do a full-set of nails. Ladies, I know you know how long this process can be. Throughout the at least, hour, the girl was there no one said anything. What could possibly be said? Who could explain that they thought they paid for a massage which is why they stripped down to the buff and not a full-set manicure? They just had to sit there, awkwardly; the Czech woman doing exactly what she was supposed to be doing because this girl pointed and, in fact paid, for it and then there is this crazy American girl who gets naked for a manicure. When the manicure was over the Czech women left the room, the American girl got re-dressed and just left. Absolutely, hilarious! This type of complete miscommunication could only happen by means of extreme language barriers! I absolutely love it.
The moral of all these stories is to realize the frustration most people feel about language barriers shouldn’t be anger or annoyance, they are absolutely amusing! I often joke that my French is amazing when I am explaining to someone how bad it is. Most people in the United States may not have had the opportunity to experience the other side of the language barrier but if they are able to put themselves in the other’s shoes and not take themselves so seriously these situations more people would realize that these situations are riddled with humor.
